Mirrors We Didn’t Know We Needed

Point B:
Because I grew up in a small town with 3 older sisters, I was used to hearing people tell me that I looked or acted a lot like them. It was something that I took for granted.

For me it's sometimes difficult to recognize the facial resemblances that my 2 sons share with me. I think the biggest reason is because they are boys. It was not a total shock for me to immediately notice how much you looked like me when I was your age. However, you did TOTALLY shock me in a very UNEXPECTED way! We acted alike, we both talked with our hands and we even sat like each other. Remember it was so noticeable that our husbands laughed at us. HOW WAS THAT POSSIBLE WHEN I HAD ONLY HELD YOU WHEN YOU WERE ONE DAY OLD???

Point A:
I grew up in a family that looked similar to me. No one ever questioned that I wasn’t theirs biologically. My mother had blue eyes like mine. My brother had the same hair color. So I guess I never realized that I was missing the genetic mirroring. Then my son was born.

My husband & I were so taken back because he looked so much like my husband. (My husband is also an adoptee). We just couldn’t get over the resemblances. I think we looked over every inch of his little body, commenting on every feature he got from us.

When your photos arrived in the mail after our initial phone call I couldn’t believe my eyes! It was like looking in a mirror but from a decade ago. It was the most eerie and beautiful thing I had ever seen.

Image Descriptions (for accessibility):

1. A graphic with a street sign showing “Nature” pointing left and “Nurture” pointing right, next to a blue question mark with a small figure sitting on it. The caption reads “The Great Debate: Psychologists have been debating this idea for years: Nature vs Nurture, Identical Strangers.”

2. A scrapbook-style page with two framed portraits: one of a young woman with long straight brown hair and a pink sweater, and another of a younger woman with curled brown hair and a big smile. A tree illustration is at the bottom left. The quote says: “Family faces are magic mirrors. Looking at people who belong to us, we see the past, present and future.” – Gail Buckley.